I don’t know if this is the place for this. I am struggling with some things. I am broken hearted and discouraged and sad and I feel selfish for feeling that way because I have a lot to be thankful for as well. My husband and I were married 12 years come August 12th, we eloped (I had the official do it outside as I wanted to be married outside, lol) I bought a spring white dress at about $50 we just had parents and my sister there and went to a nice restaurant after. We never did a honeymoon. The only vacations we ever took was to visit grandparents or great grandparents with kids. We finally decided to spoil ourselves and have a real vacation. I mean we never even did an in town over night or weekend thing just us. We were going to do a vacation somewhere we had never been. We got reservations to a restaurant that is hard to get reservations for. We rented a house in the area, bought plane tickets and we got my father in law to stay with the kids for 5 days. It was always hard to get any babysitting from any family for three boys. Neither set of grandparents really ever wanted to watch all 3 of them. And now that my dad passed away in 2019, my mom was definitely not able to because she has become emotionally unstable. Anyway, I know this is long as I keep rabbit trailing. So we planned this vacation that may be canceled due to covid cases increasing again. Our trip was to California, and my husband just heard they are going into lockdown probably the same week we go on our trip. We finally decided to do something for ourselves and we were vaccinated and we wore our masks out of a love for our neighbors and a respectfulness for the safety of others even after vaccination because my kids weren’t and I wanted to be an example and because I knew people that were afraid to leave their house because they struggle with ocd. Part of me feels like I am being punished unfairly because others could not be as respectful. Part of me understands. I could really use prayers. I am afraid we won’t get the money back. We had some money that we were either going to use on our house and some updated furniture as we still have apartment college furniture or on a vacation for us finally after 12 years. I can live with canceling our one vacation/honeymoon if the place we are staying reimbursed us as well as the restaurant and the airline and the in person chef coming to the house we rented the day we get there. I guess prayers that we either get to enjoy what we spent our money on or prayers that we get all the money back so we can spend it on the house instead. It’s just a lot of money to lose and it will take a several years to get back to where we were.

Posted by daisy at 2021-07-30 19:40:27 UTC